Atlanta

Everyone knows the best way to get from Atlanta to Las Vegas is to fly to LA, rent a bus, and drive four hours to the strip. Unless you are NeNe, the host, who arranges to fly first class from LA. The other women let it slide, because she is starring on a sitcom and therefore the most famous person on the cast.

Kenya Moore is one of the most beautiful, vivacious, and witty creatures to ever grace a reality television program, and on this trip she is desperately trying to get married to a human thumb of a man named Walter. Even worse, she plans to goad him into eloping by flirting with Phaedra’s husband Apollo right in front of everyone.

Housewife trips have been described in many ways: scary, wild, booze-soaked, contentious, from hell, etc. South Africa is probably the only one that could be described as moving. Sure, there were catered lunches out in the wildlife park, and safari rides to let the women ogle beautiful animals (not to mention flummox their guide by asking where the Indian tigers are), but the highlight was visiting a nearby orphanage.

As Cynthia’s bachelorette weekend kicks off, there is one question on everybody’s lips: What happened on that bus? Kim Zolciak and NeNe Leakes almost came to blows aboard Kandi’s tour bus because NeNe called Kim’s assistant Sweetie a “slave.” Instead of greeting the bride, they stand in the driveway of notorious Miami creep Thomas Kramer’s Star Island home bickering while Kim smokes.