Everyone has a reason to be mad at Heather on this trip, and they are all different reasons, but really they are all mad about the 55 million dollars. When they aren’t seething with jealousy, the women go parasailing, they do overzealous pool workouts, and they order a toothbrush from the front desk for Shannon, who has not brushed her teeth in four days.
Vicki shows up unexpectedly to harangue Jenn for leaving her husband and then break down crying because checks notes: the women are being mean to each other. The nerve! No wonder she is the OG.
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Sleeping in vans and roaring around the dunes in dune buggies and ATVs, has any vacation ever been more on-brand for Tamra Judge? Technically it’s her husband Eddie’s trip, for his birthday, but if you invite Housewives on your trip, it’s a Housewives trip.
Lizzie “feels'' pregnant and isn’t drinking, a clear violation of the “whoop it up” mandate. Vicki and Shannon are not having it. They order a pregnancy test to her room so that they can all take it as a group. It’s negative, so poor Lizzie must commence with taking shots.
Heather Dubrow is a woman whose brand is Champs, so it makes sense that she is developing her own champagne, or “méthode champenoise” with Gallo.
A gorgeous resort, in one of the most beautiful countries on earth. A spiritual retreat most Americans could only dream of. What a perfect setting to argue about Lizzie’s birthday party. You see, Tamra didn’t attend the party, canceling at the last minute because her daughter was sick.
The Beadors are in trouble. Everyone in the OC knows that David sent Shannon an email to soft launch a divorce, but Vicki is coming to the rescue. She invites the Beadors to hang out in her home-away-from-home Puerto Vallarta (her dad was one of the “first owners” there) with her and Brooks, so they can be positively influenced by seeing a “healthy couple.”
Some wild things happened on Tamra’s bachelorette getaway in Puerto Vallarta. The male strippers were overly zealous. Vicki sat on Tamra’s bed to download after a fun night out and left a little pee behind. Tamra, Lydia, Shannon, and Vicki snuck out of the elegant seafood restaurant Heather picked for them and went clubbing.
This is all Vicki’s idea. Her son Michael has just gotten back from a trip to Costa Rica and he just loved all the zip-lining and white water rafting. Surely if Michael enjoyed it then Heather Dubrow and Gretchen Rossi will as well? Alexis has a nervous breakdown about zip-lining.
Housewives A-Team Vicki and Tamra stayed at home on this trip, while B-Squad Gretchen, Alexis, Peggy Tanous, and Fernanda explored a cornucopia of bull-centric activities. They ate BBQ and listened to Alexis describe her eating disorder. They watched bull riding.
It was a girls weekend. A weekend for the girls. And Tamra’s husband Simon. And Gretchen’s boyfriend Slade. And Alexis’ chin-challenged husband Jim Bellino.
Gretchen is keen to enjoy some of San Francisco’s fine dining, but unfortunately, she has brought along Alexis Bellino, a woman who thinks a rare and expensive dish is called a “delicatessen.”