And that’s only the first five minutes of the least celebratory bachelorette in history. First, there is a concert where Kim sings ‘Tardy for the Party’ to open for Kandi. Then Cynthia walks in a swimwear show that she is not only not excited for, but needs to do in order to pay for her wedding now that Peter’s lounge has closed. It’s dour.
Cynthia breaks down in tears when Kandi asks if she is going to go on a honeymoon. She almost leaves before the strippers, but just because the marriage is doomed doesn't mean you shouldn’t enjoy seeing some of Phaedra’s clients drop their trousers.
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Marlo Hampton is Fashion and Labels. Her brand is Brands. And she is bereft at the state of Shamari Fears’ wardrobe and won’t let her come to breakfast until she can dress her up. It’s a rainy Florida day and this is, without a doubt, the most accomplished group of Housewives, so naturally they decide on a talent contest.
Cynthia, and her cheekbones, have brought the gals to Barcelona so they can help her check off all the items on 50 Cent’s Birthday Bucket List. Her fatal mistake, however, was booking an Airbnb. The Peaches hate this so much that, as they are leaving after one night to check into a hotel instead, they yell “Bye mildew!”.
What better reason to go to Hawaii than to celebrate your soon-to-be ex-husband’s birthday? Cynthia Bailey can’t think of one, so off we go on a couple’s trip. As the whole party jetted around on a speedboat, talk turned to divorce.
Housewives are famous for their feuds. It’s what the whole franchise is built on. But no feud has ever been nastier than Phaedra vs. Kenya, who hated each other from the start. And yet, even they managed to come together to give some kids from Flint a good time at camp.
The world didn’t know it at the time, but Peter and Cynthia’s marriage was in its final stages. That desperation may explain why Peter surprised his wife by inviting her sister Mallory, a woman who once tried to cancel their wedding by hiding the marriage certificate, to his homeland.
We knew this trip was fated to be wild when Shamea gave a tour of the rooms wearing a gold bikini and heels. Kim Fields, who had never been away from her family for more than a night, was not ready. The rest of the women were just pumped to have childcare and a suitcase full of macramé cover-ups.
Claudia hosts this trip because she wants to share her love of Zen spirituality with the other Peaches. Best of luck! This is a group of women who have recently embarked on Friend Group Therapy. There is hope though, because NeNe is not coming along. The first stop is a detox.
In a bid to become a full-time housewife, Demetria McKinney, and her rich boyfriend Roger Bobb, fly all the women to Puerto Rico to see her concert. But one season wonder Claudia Jordan is the star of the trip as the newbie who finally comes for NeNe.
The bus is leaving for Savannah at 11am. Naturally, only two wives show up before 12:30. Around 1:30pm, NeNe, who reserved the bus, goes home to pray, “Lord, I know you are not putting me on the road with these bitches. Please help me not to kill someone today.”
The bus is leaving for Savannah at 11am. Naturally, only two wives show up before 12:30. Around 1:30pm, NeNe, who reserved the bus, goes home to pray, “Lord, I know you are not putting me on the road with these bitches. Please help me not to kill someone today.”