It’s all beautiful at first. Birthday dinners for Mauricio on the beach. Bathing beauties Camille and Brandi getting spritzed with SPF by cabana boys poolside. Then Kim, finally able to locate her passport, arrives a day late with her boyfriend Ken in tow.
Kyle, now in an anxiety spiral no spiritual tome can fix, spends the rest of the trip fretting about her sister’s sobriety. Except that is, when she is listening from a lounge chair when Taylor calls to inform her that she and Russell are divorcing.
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It’s the city of love and models. Brandi and Yolanda jog along the Seine and remember what it was like to be young and gorgeous, walking the catwalk. Kyle and Mauricio write their name on a lock and snap it shut on the Love Lock Bridge, ensuring that they will be together for several more seasons.
Brandi invites the gals to demonstrate her new business venture, stripper fitness. Unsurprisingly, Camille Grammer (née Club MTV) and Yolanda Foster (née Hadid/now Hadid) are lithe and sensuous. Kyle tries her best. Marisa Zanuck, daughter-in-law of legendary producer Richard Zanuck, proclaims that pole dancing isn’t sexy, earning money is sexy.
The Ojai Valley is known for beautiful hiking trails, art galleries, and new age shops. It’s the perfect place to argue about whose book deal is in poor taste. The first evening’s dinner is barely underway when Adrienne Maloof, noticing that Brandi and Kim get teary during a tête-à-tête about combining pills and booze, tucks her bedazzled weave behind one ear and sneers, “Oh no, someone’s crying” to which Brandi retorts, “Shut the f&@k up.”
This two-day jaunt to see Kelsey Grammer’s Broadway debut in La Cage aux Folles is where this newbie housewife franchise finally found its footing, with an iconic showdown in Serafina between Kyle Richards and Camille Grammer.
If you’re going to visit Vegas, the best way is to go with the owner of a casino. Adrienne Maloof put the ladies and their husbands up in The Palms Casino Resort and got them tickets to Jay-Z, an artist none of the wives were familiar with outside of being Beyonce's husband.